Opinions

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If you’ve known me for any length of time, or if you don’t know me at all, for that matter, you may have figured out a little quirk about me. I love to keep those that have chosen to love me unconditionally on their toes. ALL THE TIME.

And that my friends, is no exaggeration. I’m spontaneous, but I am not. I have horrible habits. I make terrible decisions. But, at the same time, I have fantastic habits and make fantastic decisions. I love to help wherever I am needed, I love to donate time, talent and treasure to organizations that are dear to my heart. I am literally all over the place.

And for YEARS I battled with this. “Be the person you’re supposed to be.” “Set goals to accomplish success.” “Just behave.”

Oh those phrases drove me crazy. I went to school to become an advertising extraordinaire. Five years into my career, I was miserable and had an unbelievable calling to be in the classroom.

So, I went to get my Masters and I became a teacher.

And I was there for almost 8 years–but then found myself miserable again. I mean– a deep, dark misery that stemmed from events completely out of my control. But as each event occurred, I found myself spiraling out of control into a place I didn’t want to be.

When you get into your headspace, really get into it, you realize that there is really only one shot at this life, and it really isn’t necessary to be miserable in your choices. So I made a conscious decision to find my new happy. To follow my joy.

Is that path easy? Absolutely not. It has twists, turns, bumps and dark places. It includes learning to live in a way that you have never lived before. New habits, new schedules, new everything. And it is overwhelming at times.

Why do I write all this for the world to read? Because, I want you to know that you are not alone. EVER. There is somebody, somewhere going through a very similar journey as you.

And most importantly, maybe you’re approaching a crossroads that is frightening and you are terrified to choose the wrong path. Just know this:

“Other people’s opinions are none of your business.”

I recently read “Girl, Wash Your Face-Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Are Meant to Be” by Rachel Hollis. It has been very eye opening to say the least. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it.

Yep. IT IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS what others think of you. Because YOU DO YOU, good/bad/everything in between.

I don’t strive to be perfect anymore. I own up to my mistakes, I own up to my successes. I own up to my life. I strive to be imperfect — I’m perfect.

The best decision I have made in this turbulent year or so has been to join the oil community. It’s so much more than products. It’s a group of individuals that have come from every walk of life and joined together under one common passion: essential oils.

Sleep. Wellness promotion. You name it, there’s an oil for that. And a community that is so happy to walk you through the journey. If you are the least bit interested in what these can do for you, I encourage you to visit The Oily Life and join us (links are provided to get started). If oils aren’t your thing–still check it out, you will be surprised how versatile oils are for EVERYONE.

And I’m finding my happy. I want the same for you. If all you get from reading this stream of thought is that you are not alone, then I will be happy for you. Because you are not.

Let’s be perfectly imperfect together.

 

40 Days – Day 36

It NEVER fails to amaze me when I start to see a pattern of lessons, from different sources, all pointing to the same direction.

Today, in Best Lent Ever, they explore managing the PRESENT to create the future. And what is so crazy about that??? Well, in all of the literature I’m reading, in all of the IG and Facebook posts I’m following–there is a THEME.

What is that theme?

To embrace SILENCE, SOLITUDE and STILLNESS.

Set aside a time every day to reflect upon your life, your meaning, your purpose.

Great lives are made up of action AND rests.

Rests = silence, solitude and stillness.

You will truly find when you put yourself in good headspace, the rest of the day flows easily. Even on bad days. Head space is SO important.

What’s even more, Mercury is in retrograde, that even has the non-believers grasping for air. It’s just off. Have you noticed? Are you cranky for NO reason? Do you want to be all by yourself, when normally you’re a social junkie? It’s no joke. My very dear friend at ShopMyrrh.com explains it so very well. But what YOU need to take out of it all–is do not ignore your body’s natural pull to stay home or be suddenly introverted.

Because, to be the best-version-of-yourself in the future, you must be 100% in the present. And a lot of times, to do that, you must rest.

So, friends, rest.

SILENCE, SOLITUDE, STILLNESS.

If even for 10 minutes.

Then open your eyes, smile, and know that love and peace fill your heart.

XOXO.

40 Days – Day 23

Anger/Temper/Frustration.

This is something we have a huge issue with at my house. We are all hot heads (well, everyone but Tyson, because he’s just awesome). We all too often react to situations rather than take a step back and let the moment sink in.

Today’s message is about just THAT. Are we really striving to become the best-version-of-ourselves when we are being reactive rather than responsive? There is a huge difference.

I think there’s a real distinction between responding and reacting, you know? And of course, animals react. Something happens to an animal and an animal just reacts, because animals are not responsible. What does that mean? They’re not response-able. They’re not capable of response. They’re not able to respond. The way they’re made, the way they were created . . . They react. Whereas human beings . . . We’re responsible. We’re response-able. We’re able to respond. We’re capable of response. But very often we just react to things.” -Matthew Kelly

Take that in. Really read those words. Are YOU reactive or responsive? One of my goals this Lent is to become more respond-able and less reactive. Encourage my boys to take a step back and think through situations before I just BLOW up at them. Learning to respond helps you to grow in virtue and character, helps you to become the best-version-of-yourself.

And if you’re sitting there thinking to yourself as you’re reading this, “there is no way. I’ve just been hard wired with a short fuse.” Remember this: People don’t have bad tempers; they have badly trained tempers. And you CAN train your brain new tricks.

Become a master of your temper. When things do not go as you would like them to, pause before reacting. Breathe deeply. Remind yourself that in the grand scheme of human history, this is just one moment. And walk away from the situation to collect yourself if necessary. Remember–to live in the PRESENT.

Repeat this 30 times a day if you have to. But grow. You’ll be so happy you did. “Jesus, let me be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for the anger of man does not work the righteousness of God. (James 1:19–20)”

Day 23: JOY and GRATITUDE

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Since as long as I can remember, I have been obsessed with all things astrology/numerology/card readings, etc. I think the obsession began with the song by 5th Dimension “Age of Aquarius.” (My mother was a product of the 60s/70s so I got to listen to all that starting at a very early age). I am an aquarius and I was obsessed with the fact that they made a whole song about it. So of course (because I love to learn), I dove in to learn all about aquarius.

I have a tendency to go in and out of my studies of these things, for various reasons. When I was younger it was because people actually told me it was close to witchcraft (gasp). When I became older, it was because I had to prioritize what I was doing, and often that study just fell to the wayside. But I’ve always been fascinated.

So, I really find joy in these studies. And I truly believe this is not witchcraft or going against God. In fact, I think it is the complete opposite. I think it is a way to connect to the Universe He created and helping to decipher his ultimate plans for me.

On Saturday, March 17 we will be going through a new moon. The new moon affords us a time to bring balance to our entire system: body, mind and spirit. During the new moon phase, we are able to see more clearly–and to find areas that are off balance and to set intentions for where we want to be. BALANCE.

In “A Workbook By Spirit Daughter” the new moon is discussed. This particular new moon is in Pisces. Pisces is pure bliss. She flows through the rhythm of life and can teach us how to do the same. This season is a time to align with her boundless energy and realize that YOU are boundless.

It’s time to receive what you are set to receive. The key to receiving is LETTING GO. Let go of the negative energy that is holding you back and open your heart to what your DREAMS are–and get those dreams!!

If you are even somewhat interested in the moon, its phases and how it can affect your energies, I highly encourage you to check out shopmyhrr.com.

This week, in preparation for the new moon, complete the following tasks:

Ask yourself:

  1. Where can you let go of control?
  2. In what situations can you become the observer instead of the doer?
  3. When do you feel the most calm? How can you cultivate that feeling in more situations?
  4. What wounds have become, or will become, your greatest power?
  5. What is your dream? Think about it –and create a scene in your mind. What would you be doing RIGHT NOW if your dream was to come to fruition? No limits, as much detail as possible.
  6. Plant your intentions. Write them in present tense “I am a successful entrepreneur,” “My son is healthy, happy and confident,” etc.

Be authentically you–and the Universe will put everything else into place.

40 Days – Day 22

The myth of happiness.

So the great myth of our day and age is that if we do anything we want, we will find that perfect path to happiness. Guess what? As evidenced by the pure anger, hate and vitriol we witness day in and day out in our society, we know that doing whatever we want is not leading us to a road of happiness.

Think about it. If you are out trolling social media and blogs and spouting negative energy–are you TRULY happy with yourself? Or, is there something deep down, that is telling you that just wasn’t the right thing to say–and you may have truly hurt someone by saying it.

Live your life with an open mind and an open heart.  It is said that the influence of the moon will affect your life whether you believe in it or not, but true manifestation comes from believing in what is not known and having faith. And to truly believe what is not known and have true, unadulterated faith, you need discipline.

And it’s not just formal discipline. It’s also routine. Like, don’t leave the house without saying “I love you.” Don’t let your boys go without a hug and kiss (while they’re still young enough to let you do such a thing).

God wants absolute, pure joy for you. How mind blowing is that?!?!? That there is someone out there that only wants PURE JOY for you. And ok, maybe you don’t think it’s God. Maybe you think it’s a Universal Idea. But it’s there. There is no denying that. You manifest this powerful energy into your life by using discipline. Discipline to pray, to meditate, to follow routines…and then your happiness follows.

Just the thought of that powers me up BIG TIME.

So don’t say “I can’t.” Or “I don’t believe” (because we’ve already discussed that whole believing concept). Just put your mind to it and go.

Start with baby steps. Prioritize your areas of discipline with what needs the most work (#1 on the list) and what needs the least work (last on the list). Then set out your means to accomplish these disciplines.

The Universe is an awesomely, amazing place, and it (and He) wants NOTHING more than you to be completely happy.

Day 22: JOY and GRATITUDE

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You know, you can have all the joy in the world, but if you aren’t thankful for what you have, it can backfire on you. Jen Sincero (of the “You are a BadAss” series) gives a great example of this. Think about a group of kiddos hard at play. You bake them cookies. Some of the kiddos inhale the cookies so fast, it’s hard for you to believe they have even registered that they have eaten them. No thanks, just back off to play. Then the next set of kiddos eat the cookies, may even give you a thanks, but then return to their play. But there is ALWAYS that one kid. The one that stays behind, and not only tells you thank you, but then offers to help you clean up after his friends.

You know where that kid gets with his gratitude? A WHOLE LOT FURTHER than those other kids. I can tell you, as a parent and a former teacher, that it is a lot easier to help those that are appreciative of your efforts than those that don’t show it, or are not appreciative of it at all. Yes, that kid DOES get the biggest piece of cake. Or the first turn on a fabulous new toy. Because he is THANKFUL for it.

 

40 Days – Day 20

Your conscious. That gut feeling. That instinct.

It’s a God given gift to help guide you through this journey of life. Think about the times you slowed down to listen to what your conscious was telling you. Did you listen to it? Do you regret listening to it? I’m willing to bet that if you slowed down and actually listened, and then acted on that voice–you don’t regret the decision you made. Why? Phillipians 4:19 tells us “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” God gifted us with our conscious so that we can become the best-versions-of-ourselves. And we are striving to become the best version, God is meeting our needs. Jesus is giving us His salvation. And that is glorious.

Strive to live an authentic life. Become undivided. Become YOU. The gifts and treasures that await you are so profound you can even imagine them. Today, Matthew Kelly poses this: “You want to live an authentic life? Start listening to your conscience. The more you listen to it, the stronger it gets. The more you obey it, the more you live with it, the more you partner with it, collaborate with it, the stronger it gets. And the stronger it gets, the easier it is to hear.

To live an authentic life, to know you’re living an authentic life, to know that you’re doing your best—not that you’re perfect, but to know that you are working very, very hard to live an authentic life—is an amazing thing. And it’s a reward unto itself.”

So, each day, take a step back from the crazy, nonstop, loud world, and enter the classroom of silence. Your conscious is there waiting for you.If you do nothing else in this lifetime, learn to listen to the gentle voice within you. It is backed by your beliefs, and your beliefs give your life perspective and guidance. What do you believe?

I believe that my God is an awesome God. He does not break his promises.

I believe that I am abundantly blessed in family and friends.

I believe that it is my job to raise my little monsters to be the very best-versions-of-themselves that I can. They are only on loan to me from our Maker and I need to do the best I can with these precious gifts He has bestowed upon me.

I believe a smile and a kind word or action go a long, long way.

I believe that I am truly meant to be happy and get the very best from this life.

I believe that deep down, this world is a truly good place and that everyone just wants to be loved and accepted.

I believe our Church is the center of our foundation, the base of our connection with Jesus.

I believe that working hard results in playing hard, and there is nothing more perfect than that.

Day 20: JOY and GRATITUDE

So. I’m a boy mom. Every living thing in this house is a boy, including my dog. I’m severely outnumbered.

But come April, I get to bring a princess into our family. I am so very excited and I cannot wait to give this baby all the puppy snuggles and kisses she deserves.

Meet Peyton Rhey. Finally, I won’t be the ONLY girl in this house of crazy!

XOXO.

40 Days – Day 19

Oh today. Living the divided life.

Are you one person at home, another at work, another at church, the list goes on.

How I LOVE this one. Because you see, I have a problem. I have a huge tendency to live my ENTIRE life out in the open. There is very little I hide from the public–and what I hide from the public, I actually hide from EVERYBODY…so, don’t feel left out.

Sometimes that is a good thing…sometimes that is a very bad thing. I don’t know why I do it. Maybe I feel like being open and honest (regardless of the matter), I’ll gain a bigger audience. Maybe I feel like being open and honest will make my audience smaller. But there is only ONE audience that truly matters.

Matthew Kelly says today: “The reality is, at the end of the day, we should be living our lives for an audience of one. And God’s the audience. When we start living our lives for an audience of one, that’s when they start to become radically authentic.”

Who DOESN’T want to be authentic?

Open your heart. You’ll be amazed at what you find!

Ponder this for a second: “There is no faster way to create enduring unhappiness than to act against your beliefs.”

Wow.

Reflect on the areas of your life where you feel divided. Now make a choice. You can choose a new way and move toward the undivided life, or you can ignore what you have discovered and bury yourself in dividedness.

Day 19: JOY and GRATITUDE

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I LOVE to learn. LOVE IT. I will dive into books, get lost for hours on the History or Discovery channel. Question people about all kinds of things. I LOVE TO LEARN. It brings me great joy when I expand my knowledge. It brings me great joy when I can hole up for hours at a time and dive into a subject that interests me.

And I am so thankful that I have been finally learning to LISTEN to learn even more. It’s only taken me over 30 years, but hey, I’m getting there.

I love learning so much, I have a Bachelor and Masters degree. But it’s not just about those letters. It’s about so much more. I love sitting down with good friends or strangers alike and sharing together. I got a chance to do that this morning with my church community and it was so uplifting. I wasn’t the only one losing my mind. I wasn’t the only one to admit….”I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I’M DOING.”

So, my point is, sometimes learning is much more than what they can teach you in any school. Sometimes learning is examining YOURSELF and figuring out how to be your best version. Sometimes learning is LISTENING. Sometimes learning is simply just slowing down and being aware.

And that, my friends, is AMAZING.

XOXO.

40 Days – Day 16

Find meaning in your everyday living.

Work. We all work A LOT. If you start right out of college and work 40 hour weeks until you retire at 65, you will have worked apx. 86,400 hours. That’s a lot of your time. But like Matthew Kelly talked about yesterday, we have to work. And we have to find fulfillment in our work.

Today, he talks about find meaning in your work. So you’re going to work. Human nature demands that you do work. That you find fulfillment in your life. How do you make your work meaningful? Well easy answers would be become a teacher and help someone become the best version of themselves. Become a doctor and help someone heal. But what about all those other jobs in between? Not all of us can be teachers or doctors. So, if you are a fast food worker, smile and wish everyone a happy day. You could literally be saving a life by just smiling at a stranger. As a financial adviser, sit down and truly work with your clients. Show them you truly care about them and their situation.

Bring meaning to your work. Turn it into prayer. Say, “I will work this hour in prayers for my mother and her joy.” The next hour, say “I will work this hour in prayer for my children, that they remain safe, healthy and free from disease.” So on…

Life is prayer.

Transform your everyday moments to prayer. I will clean and put away these dishes in prayer of gratitude for having a roof over my head.

Find intention. Be purposeful. You will find very quickly that intention and purpose can elevate your work.

Today’s focus is this: Find something that you consider worthy of your talent and character, and give yourself to it.

Today’s call to action is: Let God guide you in the pursuit of your dreams. Ask him, “God, what do you think I should do?”

If you’d like, I’d love to hear what you have done today. Come back and comment here and let’s open up a chat. Because community is so important, too.

Day 16: JOY and GRATITUDE

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Kids. Oils. Repeat. This is my life and I love every minute of it.

For 8 years I was a teacher. And for many of those years, I loved being there. But at the end of last year, I started getting a pull at my heart that I wasn’t in the right place. I wasn’t where God wanted me anymore. So, I slowed down and started listening.

Then my husband and I started talking. I wasn’t present in the lives of my children because I was struggling to keep the work separate and failing miserably. So, we decided that it was time for me to leave teaching and to bring my focus to my children, my husband, my home. And you know what happened? I grew in faith. I grew in character. And I grew in Young Living.

I am a proud independent distributor of Young Living, and I took my passion for teaching and applied it to essential oils. I love to connect and teach people how to use and then fall in love with Young Living products.

So–you’ll notice the theme of this blog–kids, oils, repeat. Because that is my intention and purpose. To be the best mother I can be to my little monsters and to bring safe, natural products to every home I possibly can.

And my little monsters bring me so much JOY and are truly my inspiration to wake up every single morning. I am so thankful God put my friend’s posts in front of me that cold December 2016 night that my kid was REFUSING to go to bed for like the 10th day in a row. Because He brought me Young Living with those posts on social media. Young Living brought me purpose in my work.

MOMMY. OILER. I’ve found meaning. And it’s glorious.